I know I've already done a post on friends, but I'll like to add more to it without changing anything in the original post. So I guess this is it....
A friendship requires at least, two things: two people; two friends. What are
friends? I'm sure a lot of you have sat down just to think about what friends
are and their use. Just think about it, what it will be like if the people you
call friends only came to talk to you when they want something from you or they
have no one else to talk about class gossip. This is a person who develops
their opinion about you by getting to know and not by the opinion of others. A
friend is loyal and trust worthy.
If that's how your "friends" behave than they are
not your friends! Friends not are people who only talk to you or hang with you
when they need something like company, money, your time or your notes. Friends
are definitely not people who come to you only when they need something from
you or when they have nothing else doing with their time. In this age and time
that is what most friendships are like.
A friend is someone who genuinely cares about you, is there
for you in good time as well as the bad. A friend is someone who doesn't care
what others say about you and will always defend you. A friend is someone who
doesn’t need to say their sorry when their wrong, but can convey it through
other means. A friend is someone who corrects you when you are wrong, tells you
the truth but tries not to make it hurt and is not shy to be seen with you even
when you’re the lowest of the low in social hierarchy. Friends are people who
make an effort to understand you till they don't need to make an effort to
understand you any-more. A friend is a person who you can argue with without
being mad at and a friend is there for you always. If what you consider as a
friend is anything but these, the person may just be using you or might just be
around you to pass the time.
Are you able to tell your friends anything and everything?
Most people can't do that with their friends and be sure they will understand
them, will not criticize them or make fun of them. I'm not saying you should
not have little secrets, I'm saying you should be able to talk about most
things without having that voice in the back of your head telling you not to
tell then because they will laugh at you.
Like everything else friends can be grouped, there are;
1. Friends relate
to and get along with
2. People you get
along with but do not relate to
The people that you get along with but do not relate to can
also be divided into two groups;
1. People you like
to talk with to pass the time (partial friends)
2. People who you
talk to just for the sake of getting something from them or because your
friends are not there (Using them for whatever you want or need)
We all have used someone before, whether it was
intentionally or unintentionally. Most of the times it’s not something you plan
on doing, it just happens and if it’s done knowingly there is no good excuse
for just using another person, it is simply cruel and unjustifiable. Why not
try to actually be friends with the person (people) we have used, that way we
can actually have the right to ask the person for help.
One thing most people don't realize is you can be a friend
to anyone and everyone. You can be friends with that old lady who lives in your
neighborhood you can be friends to the
weird kid at school, you can be friends with that eight year old kid which
talks a lot and you can even be friends with your teacher.
“When
we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we
often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures,
have chosen rather to share our powerlessness pain and touch our wounds with a
warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of
despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement,
who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the
reality of our, that is a friend who cares.”― Henri J.M. Nouwen
The above quote shows what a real friend is; let’s hope we
can all relate to our friends like this because that is true friendship.