What are "Friends"?

What are friends? I'm sure a lot of you have sat down just to think about what friends are and their use. Just think about it, what it will be like if the people you call friends only came to talk to you when they want something from you or they have no one else to talk about class gossip.

If that's how your "friends" behave than they are not your friends! Friends not are people who only talk to you or hang with you when they need something like company, money, your time or your notes. Friends are definitely not people who come to you only when they need something from you or when they have nothing else doing with their time. In this time that is what most people’s friendships are like.

   

A friend is someone who genuinely cares about you, is there for you in good time as well as the bad. A friend is someone who doesn't care what others say about you and will always defend you. A friend is someone who corrects you when you are wrong, tells you the truth but tries not to make it hurt and is not shy to be with you when other people are around. Friends are people who make an effort to understand you till they don't need to make an effort to understand you any-more. A friend is a person who you can argue with without being mad at you and a friend is there for you always. If what you consider as a friend is anything but these, the person may just be using you or might just be around you to pass the time.

Are you able to tell your friends anything and everything? Most people can't do that with their friends and be sure they will understand them, will not criticize them or make fun of them. I'm not saying you should not have little secrets, I'm saying you should be able to talk about most things without having that voice in the back of your head telling you not to tell then because they will laugh at you.

Like everything else friends can be grouped, there are;

1.     Close friends 

2.     People you get along with

The people that you get along with can also be divided into two groups; 

1.     People you like to talk with to pass the time  

2.     People who you talk to just for the sake of getting something from them or because your other friends are not there (Using them for whatever you want or need)

We all have used someone before, whether it was intentionally or unintentionally. Most of the times it’s not something you plan on doing, it just happens and if it’s done knowingly there is no good excuse for just using another person, it is simply cruel and unjustifiable. Why not try to actually be friends with the person (people) we have used, that way we can actually have the right to ask the person for help.

One thing most people don't realize is you can be a friend to anyone and everyone. You can be friends with that old lady who lives in you neighbourhood  you can be friends to the weird kid at school, you can be friends with that eight year old kid which talks a lot and you can even be friends with your teacher.

“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.”― Henri J.M. Nouwen

The above quote shows what a real friend is; let’s hope we can all relate to our friends like this because that is true friendship.